Stitches, Smoothies, and Soup

You just know it's going to be a great day when you start the morning off at the oral surgeon's office.  I can't begin to tell you how much I was looking forward to this day.  I even forwent a torturous workout with my trainer for the privilege of waitng for over an hour to enter a different type of torture chamber! 

I'd lost a crown on one of my teeth and needed to have it seen to.  Unfortunately, there wasn't enough tooth left to re-crown so extraction and preparation for an implant was my only option.  Oh joy!  Okay, I'm a big girl and I can do this...right?  Right!

The dental assistant comes in and goes over the procedure, takes my blood pressure which was elevated, of course (hell you're fixing to yank a tooth out of my mouth...hello!), and gave me all the paperwork to sign.  This paperwork also included the total cost of all involved - well, up goes my blood pressure.  She then proceeds to prep me for "surgery," paper hat on the head and all. So now I'm getting nervous!  Why on earth does my hair need to be covered?  Is there a possibility of random stuff just flying out of my mouth and landing in my hair?  Okay, knowing me, there is a big chance of certain words flying out my mouth during a moment like this.  Oh wait, I wasn't able to actually speak this whole time.  Yet that didn't keep the doctor from trying to engage in a conversation.  Are they taught that in school?  Man, I had to result to gibberish and sign language to respond.

As much as I tried to maintain my calm exterior, I was not a happy camper on the inside.  I kept finding myself rising up to follow that tooth and reminding myself to find my "happy place."  You know what?  My happy place isn't within miles of a dental office! They teased me with Pina Colada-flavored topical numbing solution when I certainly could have used the real deal.  Guess what?  I felt that damn needle anyway...three times! Breathe through your nose, breathe through your nose, and ignore the sponge that's in danger of being swallowed.  Somebody save me! 

Well, I lived through it and was starving afterwards.  Could I eat?  A resounding NO!  So I stopped by our local produce market which happens to make amazing and healthy smoothies and grabbed "lunch."  Dinner tonight?  Soup.  I have a better liquid diet in mind which could also serve to be a painkiller.  Yeah, you know what I'm talking about!

This day was so much fun that it left me in stitches...literally! 

Blah...

Here's a question for you:  Say you have a friend who calls you up asking if you and your family would like to join him and his family on the beautiful South Carolina coastline next week while our kids are out of school, then mentions that we can all fly up together in his private jet.  Do you (A) play it cool and tell him you'll have to check your schedule and get back to him, or (B) do you hang up the phone and run to grab a suitcase so fast you leave a vacuum in your wake?  Yeah...I thought so.

I've been blessed with incredible and generous friends from all walks of life.  Some rich and some poor; some famous and others who are just regular people like me.  I don't care what you have or don't have, what I do care about is if you have a good heart and treat people kindly.  All I want from a friend is what I try to give to mine; respect, support, kindness, love, and sprinkling of humor to keep it interesting.

It's interesting how, not too long after blogging about a local eatery featuring Lowcountry cuisine, that I'll find myself right in the heart of  South Carolina's Lowcountry itself.  Actually, I'm not sure I'm doing this type of food honor by calling it "cuisine."  It's down home cookin', plain and simple!  I've always wanted to go to Charleston and stroll its beautiful historic streets and taste the food that is a melting pot of culinary influences from all over the globe.  Looks like now I'll get my chance!  Maybe I'll put together a Lowcountry Boil while we're there to thank my friends for including us.

Cheers, ya'll!

"Fall"ing Into October

About a week ago, on the cusp of October, a friend of mine asked if I was planning anything grand to blog about for Octoberfest...umm, not really. He challenged me to create a cocktail to celebrate the Fall.  While I'm not a Mixologist, I have experienced a near fall at the hands of one.  Let's just say it was a Dark & Stormy night!  I'm more of a pop-the-top/cork kind of girl so mixing it up behind the bar really doesn't resonate with me unless I'm on the receiving end.  I'm thinking about a Pumpkin Martini...we'll see.

Having said that, though, I did come up with a quick and easy menu tonight that's definitely a nod to Octoberfest.  Beer-Braised Brats with Sauteed Onions & Saeurkraut and Pickled Beets. 

Job done, I hope!

Cheers!

Weekend Update

Does the title of this blog post remind anyone else of Saturday Night Live or is it just me?  I feel a Chevy Chase pratfall coming on! 

Anyway, let's start with Friday night and an impromptu high school reunion with about a dozen classmates.  Being the first to arrive, the hubby and I had time to check out our friends' band who was playing just outside our designated meeting place at the Historic Downtown Fall Festival.  It was very difficult to pull ourselves away from the music and go back to the restaurant where we were to meet.  This band (Mo Geetz) totally rocks and it just blows my socks off to know that their guitarist - an aging, raspy-voiced veteran - is my son's guitar instructor.  That man can really lay it down!  But, I had a great time reconnecting with friends I hadn't seen in a while.  We definitely need to do this more often and get more friends involved.

Moving on to Saturday.  My son's girlfriend came over and they began their assignment of doing homework together.  Sorry, but if you want to hang out and homework is due, then you can work side-by-side and get it done.  When it was time for lunch, I took the opportunity to introduce them the my new favorite diner, Sun on the Beach.  They had the hardest time making a choice.  "If you order grits and I order home-fries then we can share."  "Wait, we need crepes and fried-green-tomatoes, too."  They were just too cute!  At around 4 PM we transferred the kids to her house because we were meeting friends for a 3-hour sunset cruise. 

The group of friends who went on this three-hour tour are people I work on a celebrity/charity golf tournament with.  We each spend dozens of hours a year raising awareness and funds for a worthwhile cause, but never really pause to do something for ourselves.  When the sunset cruise came up for auction last January at the charity event, we decided to go in as a group and bid on it.  Too bad it took us until October to get all of our schedules straight and find a day when we were all available!  It was a gorgeous day cruising down Cocoa Beach with a rainbow on the horizon, dolphins frolicking alongside, and the promised sunset melting into the Atlantic.

Sunday was spent in my favorite place - my kitchen.  I marinated a boneless leg of lamb and made hummus, tabbouleh, and tzatziki sauce because gyros were on the menu.  Note to self:  Don't put a leg of lamb on the grill, shut the lid, then get distracted by chatting with your son's friends who stopped by to visit.  I ran out to the grill to find flames practically shooting out of it!  That poor lamb looked like a meteor.  Fortunately, I just flipped it over and got a nice char on the other side, then transferred it to the oven to finish cooking.  Whew!  Disaster diverted...pass the ouzo.

Opa!

Paradise, Projects, and Pizza

Thursdays are my husband's day off so we usually plan to work on some of our little "projects" or tackle things that we've been putting off.  Well, yesterday was all of that rolled into one and jacked up on steroids...figuratively, of course!

We started the day with a visit to our friendly trainer who seemingly takes great pleasure from putting middle-aged people through their paces (or pacemakers!)  I'm hoping he's certified in CPR...damn, should have checked that fact before signing on with him!  While I joke, though, I'm very pleased with the results he's getting from both of us and we're on target with our goals.  I'm bulking up while the hubby's bulking down so that's a very good thing.  From there, we moved on to our favorite new food joint for an early lunch overlooking the ocean while listening to Jimmy Buffett on the sound system.  Almost paradise!

On to a visit with the in-laws to check in and see if mom's having a good day.  Not too bad, considering that we're slowly losing her the the demon that is ALS.  She was fairly alert, had eaten a bit, and seemed to enjoy our banter but it's very hard to distinguish what's really going on.  Dad's hanging in there and getting more rest because he now has more help which is a blessing.

For the past few weeks I've been hinting to the hubby that I'd really like to get our Fall decorations out of storage so I could start decorating the house.  His response was he wasn't bringing one more item into "his" garage until we could park both of our cars in there.  After 23-years of marriage I'm familiar with the history here, so I really didn't hold much hope.  But, he's diligently been working on that project and we can now fit 2 cars into our 3-car garage!  So I thought I'd make my move again.  "Honey, can we now please get the Fall decorations?"  To which he responded, "Only if you help me clean out the storage unit(s)."  Fine...

OMG, where the hell did all this stuff come from?  I know we've been married for a long time and have accumulated a lot of "treasures" over the years, but seriously!!  There's no way to organize, decide what to throw away and what to keep, or just wrap the mind around, well, all of it, before we have to pick our son up from school.  Toted, hauled, & shifted things in a hurry and got my goal accomplished and loaded on board.  We grabbed our from school who was, of course, starving (!) so we stopped for a quick bite of sushi before heading home to unload the truck.  Boy, is that kid ever a fearless eater!

The real task began when we got home and I entered the "project zone" and kept finding things that needed to be done because the sun was still shining.  Let's clean off the back patio (the one that extends beyond the screened pool enclosure), which had really become The Land Where Grills Go To Die.  We had a huge old gas grill and a Webber charcoal one that we hadn't used in years and were providing low-rent housing for countless squatters.  We cleaned them up and dragged them to the garage. Mind you, this is the same garage my husband had just taken a bunch of stuff out of.  While we were at it I trimmed my herbs, pulled a bucket-load of weeds, cleaned up the butterfly garden which had gone to weed, went to battle with more spiders (and won), lost a battle with a cactus, remembered that I'm as crazy with a leaf blower as I am with a pressure washer, and moved a heavy granite-topped table...twice!  I think we wore a track in the grass between the garage and the backyard.

I finally made it to the inside of the house to begin the project that started this whole snowball effect, putting up the Fall decorations. I lasted about an hour before exhaustion and hunger took its toll.  Dinner?  I phoned it in, literally, and ordered a pizza from our favorite pizza place, Bizzarro's. What started as a little mom & pop pizza joint at the beach has blossomed into countless franchises throughout the county. This pizza can hold its own anywhere in the country. I have to chuckle when I think about each time we visit the original location because it's almost like visiting the "Soup Nazi" on the old Jerry Seinfeld show. Don't hesitate or you might find yourself being directed to the back of the line!

Cheers!

Tropical Depression...Isn't that an Oxymoron?

While listening to the splatter of rain on my roof from Tropical Depression 16, which has now escalated into Tropical Storm Nicole, it occurred to me that the term "tropical depression" just doesn't sound right.  What I picture when I think of the tropics is warm sunshine, a fruity umbrella drink in my hand, and my toes in the water and my ass in the sand (thank you, Zac Brown Band.)  What's depressing about that?

In a moment of calculated spontaneity I thought I'd make it my personal business to make a public secret of some of my worst favorite culinary-related oxymorons and list them in orderly confusion. I hope you find this seriously funny, predictably random, and sinfully good.

All natural artificial flavor, bland spice, boneless ribs, cafeteria food, canned fresh, catfish, cold toast, daily special, disiplined gluttony, fish farm, fresh raisins, fresh sour cream, frugal gourmet, good fast food, Grape Nuts, ham steak, hot chili, kosher ham, meatless meat, mild jalapeno, non-alcoholic beer/wine, non-fat cream, oven fried, semi-boneless, sweet tart, turkey ham, twelve-ounce pound cake, vanilla fudge, and white chocolate. 

Well, that's all I have time for right now because I have to prepare for a board meeting.  Therefore, I won't be cooking dinner tonight but if I were to do so, on the menu would be - you guessed it - jumbo shrimp!

Cheers!!

Hurricanes and Hangovers

I was watching Anthony Bourdain's show, "No Reservations" earlier and the city they were showcasing was one of my favorite food destinations, New Orleans.  I couldn't help but to remember my first visit to the Crescent City.  I was 22 years-old and my husband and I were there to celebrate our first wedding anniversary.  The first thing on the agenda?  Food!  We immediately set out to find the best places the city had to offer to satisfy our appetites - and found them we did!  Boudain Blanc from the Gumbo Shop, Muffaletta sandwiches from Central Grocery, Po' boys from Mother's, Beignets from Cafe du Monde, Banana's Foster from Brennan's, and the ubiquitous Jambalaya, Red Beans & Rice, and Gumbo found on almost every menu in town.  It only took us about one day to discover that if we got up early and stayed up late, we could squeeze in more meals per day.  Genius!  Good thing Nawlins is a great walking town!

The most talked about (still) tale from this trip was our visit to Pat O'Brien's bar in the heart of "Party Central" on Bourbon street.  We got settled in at our table and ordered up a couple of their world famous Hurricanes.  Beautiful, fruity, delicious, and huge!  Boy, did they go down easy.  As we're enjoying the dueling pianos I finish off mine and the hubby slips me the rest of his with only about 1/4 of it gone then proceeds to order two more.  Repat the process - drink mine and finish his.  All was well until I stood up to find the restroom.  The table rocks, a glass hits the floor, and bouncers come out of the woodwork.  Oops!  What's worse is that I discover the ladies room is up a spiral staircase...great!

I managed to survive the staircase scare and we headed for the front door to walk back to our hotel.  Since there is no glass allowed on the streets of New Orleans, the kind folks at Pat O'Brien's will box up your souvenir Hurricane glasses so you can take them with you to "remember" what a great experience you had there.  Mind you, while New Orleans is a great city, it still has some dicey areas.  I assured my husband that if anybody tried to mess with us I'd hit them with my four Hurricane glasses.  He had to keep reminding me that I only had three glasses because I broke one, to which I slurred my response, "Well, I drank four!"

We got back to the hotel and the first thing I do is lie down on the bed.  Bad idea!  So this is what "bed-spins" feel like!  Let's just say it was a very rough awakening the next morning.  Dry heaves are not the Breakfast of Champions!  I couldn't stand the thought of eating anything until about 3:00 that afternoon and discovered that a Jambalaya Omelet is great for hangovers...who knew?

Before we left the city we bought two packages of Pat O'Brien's Hurricane mix to bring home and share with friends.  That was 22 years ago and those same two packages have moved from house to house with us and have never been used.  I think I keep them as a reminder to never do that to myself again.  Have I experienced a Hurricane since?  Only the weather-related kind.  However, for those who want a little taste of what I went through I've included a recipe for a Hurricane cocktail.  Enjoy, my friends, because I'm not jumping aboard that crazy train again!

Ingredients:

·         2 oz light rum

·         2 oz dark rum

·         2 oz passion fruit juice

·         1 oz orange juice

·         juice of a half a lime

·         1 Tbsp simple syrup

·         1 Tbsp grenadine

·         orange slice and cherry for garnish

Preparation:

1.    Squeeze juice from half a lime into shaker over ice.

2.    Pour the remaining ingredients into the cocktail shaker.

3.    Shake well.

4.    Strain into a hurricane glass.

5.    Garnish with a cherry and an orange slice

Laissez le bon ton roulette!